There comes a time in every relationship when a person may need to apologize to his or her spouse. These 10 tips for apologizing to your partner, can make that process easier. In most cases, the problem is not feeling remorseful, but rather, pride. While some may not find saying sorry a hard thing to do, for others, it is nearly impossible. Swallowing your pride can be difficult for certain individuals. So much so, that some rather lose the love of their life instead. Many relationships have ended, because one or both parties, refused to apologize.
If you are contemplating on whether or not you should say you’re sorry to your mate, read on. The same for those looking for the best ways to say sorry to your girlfriend or boyfriend. The person you may be hesitant to swallow your pride for, could be your soulmate. This may be your last opportunity to get them back, before you lose them completely. For those that have made a mistake and hurt their partner, acknowledging it is first. The next is step is saying you’re sorry.
Here are 10 tips for apologizing to your spouse, girlfriend, boyfriend, wife or partner.
Make A Reparations Proposal:
Making an offer to make amends to someone you have caused pain to can go a long way. It is imperative when asking for forgiveness, to propose making reparations to your partner. This is even more so whenever it applies to items which have been physically damaged or broken. Perhaps you crashed her car, dropped his phone or lost their favorite item. Whatever the case, the best way to fix it is by amending it. While there will be some items which are impossible to replace, (family heirlooms, etc.) you can try your best. Be certain that your spouse sees how truly sorry you are for what you did wrong. And that you will be willing to anything it takes to make things right once again.
Try Writing A Note:
Saying sorry to someone face to face can be a daunting task; especially for those with a lot of pride. Perhaps you may be shy or too embarrassed to be repentant in from of them. In instances such as these, try writing a note or a letter. While it is true that the best way to show contrition is face to face, there are other times when writing a note, may work best. There have been and are situations when a person does something so wrong, the other person does not even want to see their face. Writing a letter is a great way to demonstrate your love and sorrow. It will show that you took the time to write an apology to your spouse. Writing a note or letter also has a few benefits. For one, it is harder to say the wrong thing when you are writing it. Plus, you can put your feelings on paper without forgetting what you truly wanted to express.
Avoid Making Excuses:
Too often, people ruin an apology by making an excuse to go along with it. The truth is that individuals who do this, are often not truly sorry for what they have done. Excuses and remorse don’t go hand in hand. Whenever you apologize, you are agreeing that you are responsible. That means no one else – no excuses – are to blame for your mistakes. In the long run, expressing regret with an excuse may make things worse. The best apologies are done when a person is cloaked in humility. However, wearing a badge of excuses, only makes it seem as if you’re attempting to lessen the blame.
Admit You Were Wrong:
A person who apologizes without acknowledging their mistake is bound to repeat it again. If you don’t truly believe you were wrong, then why would you not do it again? That is why before you even think of saying you were wrong, you must admit it to yourself. Then, once you have done that, you can sincerely say it to your girlfriend, boyfriend, wife, husband or partner. No matter how insignificant the wrong was that you committed, acknowledge it. Then, once you have truly done that, say it.
Try To Make Them Laugh:
Humor has a way of ending the harshest of arguments. It also has a way to make anger fly away. Laughter is the key which is often used to soften someone you hurt, up. However, you must remember that this only applies when it’s appropriate. There are many situations when doing this can have a totally negative effect. Laughter can break tensions and make your partner see you as the person they fell in love with. Still, in instances where cheating was involved, humor is not the way to go.
Try Physical Contact:
The slightest touch from someone you love can move emotional mountains within a person’s heart. Giving your partner a hug, caress or a snuggle, can go a long way. As you touch him or her, you may want to let them know you are sorry. It may not have to be with words, but with your eyes, movement and physical touch. There will be instances where the fault you committed was too great for only a touch though. In those cases, he or she may reject your touch or contact. If that happens, then give them some time to get over it. Or just simply try to hold their hand.
Do Something Extra Special:
So you did something really awful and need to get out of the doghouse? Now you are looking for how to say sorry to your girlfriend or boyfriend in a romantic way? That means that flowers or a special cooked meal may not do it. When you have done something very bad to your partner, it is time to go all out for him or her. You can try planning a vacation to a romantic getaway. Or perhaps placing flowers all over the house or apartment. While a bouquet of flowers may not be enough, a house full of flowers is hard to resist. Use candles and teddy bears as well as candy, to make it even better. Fill each room with rose petals, balloons and other love-expressing items. You can also make plans to take your partner to a beautiful and especial restaurant.
No Strings Attached:
A vast majority of people make the mistake of saying they are remorseful, while expecting to be forgiven. In some instances, this may lead to an even bigger argument. When you decide to say you were wrong, do it without any strings attached. That means if your partner doesn’t accept it right away, be content and move on. Wait until they are ready to accept your apology. If you get angry for them not endorsing your contrition, it may lead them to feel and believe, you are not really sorry.
Buy A Great Gift:
Giving someone you have wronged a gift is an excellent way to show remorse. Jewelry, candy or an electronic gadget they always wanted, can say it for you. This is why so many look for the best apology gifts for boyfriend or girlfriend. However, in some cases, trying to buy your way out may not work. This is even more so if you have already used gifts as a way to apologize before. Too many people often think that they can buy a person’s forgiveness. But, that will have negative consequences for the entire relationship in the long term. In more ways than one.
Acknowledge Your Need To Change:
Chances are that if you are reading these tips on how to apologize to your partner, you been down this road before. A vast majority of people make a bad habit of hurting those that love them. It is one of the reasons searches on things to say to get your girlfriend to forgive you are so popular. For those that have committed the same mistakes more than once, apologies will lose their authenticity and credibility. You may have even used words such as “I Promise to….” and so on. But, in the long run, you will only make things worse for your relationship.
If you truly do not want to lose the person you love, then you have to agree to change your ways. Instead of a promise, make a pledge to alter your behavior for the better. Mistakes which have been repeated often, require contrition with actions. Saying you are regretful is no longer enough. It is time to follow it with real actions and prove it. Remember, although a person will forgive you many times, there will come a day when they won’t anymore.
Final Tips On Apologizing
Although saying you are sorry can save your relationship, it can also lead to a pivotal moment with profound consequences. During your junctures of contrition, there are other things to keep in mind. Whenever you do something long enough, it tends to lose its power and effect. Apologies only work if you do not repeat the same mistakes over and over again. This applies to individuals who abuse and over-use forgiveness. Sooner or later, there will come a time when the other person will finally have had enough. No amount of regret will make a zilch of difference. When that time comes, it is better for you to simply walk away from the relationship.
If you turn into a person who grovels continually, it may make things worse. Your former partner will end up treating you more cruelly than ever; especially since they will no longer care. In their minds, they will feel as if he or she is finally on a pedestal, and you are beneath them where you belong. Once that climatic moment is reached, no amount or type of apologies will work with that person ever again.